Well the year is now 2014 and welcome back to my little pet project! I say pet project because I’ve been too lazy to regularly update like… I… promised. Never fear! I’ve been hurranged into writing again and a few people actually griped about me not staying true to my word about posting regularly. With that in mind, let’s kick off 2014 with a bang! By bang I mean all of the hub ubb surrounding Duck Dynasty and one Phillip Robertson.
Phil Robertson did an interview with GQ magazine (who might be the real winners in this whole ordeal.. when was the last time they were relevant?) during which he made a few pointed remarks. Remarks that got under some skin in some places. The leading question, the “teaser question” if you will, is “What, in your mind, is sinful?” Ok, ask a conservative redneck from the south what is sinful and you expect… the politically correct response? Ha! Good one. Phil replied with “Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men. Don’t be deceived. Neither the adulterers, the idolaters, the male prostitutes, the homosexual offenders, the greedy, the drunkards, the slanderers, the swindlers—they won’t inherit the kingdom of God. Don’t deceive yourself. It’s not right.” Ok liberals you’re right he did say that he believed that homosexuality was a sin. He also said IN THE VERY NEXT SENTENCE that bestiality was wrong. Why isn’t the ACLU swooping in on this nugget? A man who is featured on the most popular reality television show EVER speaks out against sex with animals and no one causes an uproar?! Simply outrageous… Ok. Maybe having sex with animals is a stretch, they can’t verbally give consent so we won’t fuss over someone who doesn’t endorse that. What did Phil say next? “sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men” Hmm… he’s talking about one person sleeping with more than one gender and more than one individual. He’s already talked about his view on homosexuality. In this situation he’s not specifically talking about homosexual relations though, he’s talking about multiple partners. That sounds a lot like promiscuous behavior. Sleeping around just for the sake of sleeping around. Ok so… why aren’t people up in arms about that part? Oh wait… I know why. It’s because homosexuality is THEE HOTTEST TOPIC IN THE WORLD TODAY!!!! After ya know, overpopulation, famine, the economy, the middle east… etc etc etc… but no! We need to talk about a 2nd rate cable channel that airs a tv show about people with beards who make duck calls. My bad, news channels you were right. Lets talk about Phil for a few months. On to the next topic!
The fallout from the whole “Phil Robertson hates gays” thing is just the jumping off point. A magazine (of which I don’t know the name of because I work at Kmart and don’t care about pop culture) had a short piece, one page, on the Duck Dynasty controversy. They threw a little square on the front page to say “Look at us! We’re talking about Duck Dynasty!!” and admittedly, it did catch my attention enough to read the article. Basically, everyone in the Robertson family is behind Phil 100% The article even states that Willy, the man most likely to disagree with Phil (because he’s more business/public image/politically correct minded) didn’t turn on his father. So basically any opinion that a member of the Robertson family expresses is not going to be denounced by the family members. Which leads me to one conclusion. The second highest (behind God) power in the most popular reality TV show to ever exist is family. Not money, not fame, not screen time, not advertisements. Family. I was once asked to do something for one of my siblings, I don’t remember the specifics and they were probably boring anyways, but I had asked someone else why I’d go out of my way to do that and the response was “because they’re your family” and I immediately felt like the worlds biggest *expletive* because I didn’t realize sooner that your family is one of the biggest, most important, most influential entities that you will ever encounter in your life. And that you should be willing to do anything for them. So… the next time your home from break or have some free time and your mom or dad asks you to sweep the floor or clean your room (I’m looking at you Nate, Nik, Emma, Magnus, Conor, Claire, Colleen, Austin, Ethan, Ivy, Luke and Gene) just do it. It’ll take you 5 minutes and save both you, your parents, and your uncle a headache. 😀 Oh and by the way… I love all of you to death.
Alright I think that’s been enough for people to handle. Two paragraphs about conservative America and ol’ fashioned values?! Lets not get carried away here. I need to keep my liberal readers (of which i have none) interested. Keep checking on my page if you find what I have to say worth reading. One of my New Year’s Resolutions is to post content more regularly and I plan on keeping this one. I hope you all had a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!