Tag Archives: Discipline

Monday Mini-Rant: Discipline

I’ll dive right into it. I’ve long been disgusted by a lot of the ideas my field of study holds when it comes to discipline. Positive reinforcement. Time outs. Treat them like you would treat an adult. Go sit in the naughty corner. Put a dollar in the swear jar. First of all, swearing isn’t that big of a damn deal when you grow up. Studies have shown that subtle swearing actually makes speeches more persuasive and the use of swear words can reduce the amount of stress in certain situations. Swearing is not what I want to talk about though. Recently I was educated on the subject of discipline by an old school black woman who doesn’t mess around with formalities. A snotty little child cries and balls their eyes out at Kmart because mommy refused to buy a candy bar that the kid clearly didn’t need. A jump rope would have been more appropriate. “Damn kids these days, got no respect.” Alright, I’m not going to dispute that. “If that was my kid I’d lay a whoopin’ on them first chance I got.” Whoa, umm… ok. A whoopin’. Not sure I can endorse that but before I can interject “hold up though I don’t be beatin my kids I just lay the whoopin’ on them.” A thought pops into my head and someone else beats me to the question. “Now hold on, what exactly is the difference between a whoopin’ and a beatin’?” “You see a beatin’ you be hittin ’em and smackin ’em until yo arm tired and you kinda lose it but a whoopin’? You in control, you holdin back yo true feelings and it ain’t until your arm tired. You just be whoopin em and whoopin em and maybe you stop to take a smoke break or grab a sandwich then you come back and whoop on em some mo. It ain’t a beaten where you snap and hurt yo kid long term but they learn they lesson. That child ain’t goin be actin up again anytime soon, you know dat.” Wow, so there’s a lesson in either black culture or old school disciplinary techniques. And no I did not embellish the conversation, that’s how she actually talked, which makes that conversation that much more amazing. Now obviously I’ve expressed two very extreme examples of discipline. You don’t have to choose between a whoopin’ or a timeout. I’ve just given you an example of how things change. Whether or not this change is for the better or worse, well I’d have to say I haven’t been here long enough to know. Obviously I’m not going to be reaching for the belt whenever my future kids misbehave but you can be damn sure there won’t be a “naughty chair.” in my house. Thanks for reading and I hope to see you Wednesday.